Sweet Giveaway!

I just found an awesome giveaway from my cousin, Elena's blog. It's here:http://sunshineandlemonade.blogspot.com/

A Walk to Remember

This being the first day of the year, I resolved to start exercising again. I didn't want to throw my body into shock, so I decided on a real cushy goal. Twenty minutes each day of some form of exercise. This way I can really do it EVERY day, even Sundays. Our family usually goes on a walk together on Sundays and I will keep myself moving, even slowly as it is, during the ENTIRE year. Today, we bundled up (it really was pretty warm minus the wind) and went for more than twenty minutes! Yay for a perfect day of goal keeping. As we walked I somehow got behind everyone else. I looked up and almost fell over, and not because of the ice. There was Kaylee running along climbing over every hill of snow and Charles stopping every few feet to grab a snowball. They were HUGE! I know they don't eat many veggies, so how on earth did they get so big and tall??? It almost brought tears to my eyes to look and see my babies, and realize that they are so grown up. I felt robbed. Where was Father Time anyway? Probably hiding somewhere so he didn't have to face me and tell me what he had done. He stepped right in and stole those precious years away from me!!! What right does he have to do that?!?!
Oh, wait! Here he comes with his defense.... "But, I thought that's what you WANTED! How often did we all hear you tell us that you wished they were older? Bigger? Better able to entertain themselves, to take care of themselves? I did you a favor! You should be THANKING me!!!" He's right, you know. I did say all of those things. I wished for it. Life has a funny way of giving you just what you want, right as you realize you don't want what you thought. What would I give to have my kids be babies again. Only for a moment. To hold them as brand new precious, perfect infants fresh from Heaven. That is one of the most inspiring feelings in the world. I've never felt more capable of being a good mom. I would tell myself there is no way in the world I could ever be mad at this perfect little being. If only I could remember that when that perfect little being is wiping peanut butter on my pants, or spilling milk across my freshly scrubbed floor. Or fighting with her brother, or telling me they hate me.... I must suffer from short-term memory loss. As much as I long to have them small and swaddled in my arms again, I admit that I am so excited to watch them keep growing. They are doing so many fun things and learning so much. Kaylee is beginning to read! Charles is going to go to preschool in the fall! I don't want to stop any of that. I guess you can't have your kids and raise them too. You have to let them grow up and just savor each moment as it happens. I wish I'd had my camera to catch the view I had. A tall, slender, almost six year old girl walking with her tall, stocky three and a half year old brother. What a walk to remember.

Updates

Don't miss the cute baby pics!!! I forget that blogger posts your posts based on when you first started writing them.... my sister had her baby, so for more details, scroll down a bit.

It's My Party, and I'll Cry if I Want To!

Well, folks. It happened. I had another birthday. Really this birthday isn't that significant. I am not "that old." It's not a special milestone or anything. The only thing even slightly significant is that it is on a Sunday. The last birthday I remember having on a Sunday was my sixteenth. Actually, as I looked to double check this fact, I noticed the most recent birthday I had on a Sunday was my twenty-second. Kaylee was just about to turn one. I really don't remember anything from that day, but I was probably at my parent's house visiting for Christmas.... Back to my memory that stands out.... I was turning sixteen. I had hoped for something, I don't really know what. But when your birthday is during Christmas, and on a Sunday, it's just different. I used to think it was bad, now I just think it's different. Hmm. Anyway... I had just received a new dress. It had a dark blue background with light blue daisies all over it and a bit of lace at the neckline. I had also been given a string of pearls (not real), which I decided to wear. I walked the halls of the church feeling disappointed. Nobody remembered my birthday, and I remember feeling super awkward in that dress. Like I was trying to be grown up, but still a little girl. Fast forward to today.... We were at my parent's house visiting. They have early church. I have two children. We stayed up way too late. Bad start. We were thirty minutes late for church. My stress level was already at breaking point before ten o'clock. Not the best start to the day. It was just another day, ya know? The evening was wonderful, though. My family was able to congregate and drive my sister up the wall. That is always nice. I very much enjoyed seeing all my family, especially the new baby!, and eating a yummy dinner from mom and I received some super thoughtful gifts. I felt very spoiled. But as I drove home, the sadness almost overcame me. I finally reached the point where I feel old. Technically I am still pretty young, but I don't feel young anymore. I quit keeping track of my age when I turned twenty. By then I was dating Louis and pretty sure we were going to be getting married. Nobody cares how old you are after that, except at the DMV, and they can just calculate it. Well, somebody decided that everyone should be reminded of how old they really are. Despite this, I have battled to keep my age a mystery, if only to myself! I had it in my mind that I was still twenty, and so I acted young. Then at twenty-five, I didn't mind that age, so I took it on.... I haven't yet reached thirty, but I'm past twenty-five. I don't like my age this year, and worse than that, I can't trick myself into denying what age I really am. Perhaps it's because I pictured myself at a different place or station in life, perhaps it is the unfulfilled dreams, perhaps it's fear of the future.... The only thing I can gather for certain is that my birthdays have always brought a touch of sadness. I think this is mostly because I look back over the year and realize that I am still the same person. The "big changes" I had always planned to make never seemed to actually take place. Unfortunately this isn't the most positive of feelings. I always wish I were different in one way or another; kinder, more fit, patient, pretty, stylish, educated, wealthy, loving, etc. Maybe my problem isn't so much in what I'm not, but in overlooking what I am. I think too often we discount what we are, because we think we should be something else or somebody else. For example.... I really struggled with this ward when I first moved here. It was just too different than the other wards I'd lived in. I couldn't really stand the differences. I looked at them as "wrong." The problem deepened when I was given my "impossible" calling. Week after week I struggled to implement changes that I thought would "solve the problem." Finally one week in our presidency meeting after we each had expressed some frustration with "our situation" my wise and loving counselor said, "Maybe we should quit trying to change everything to look the way we think it should. Perhaps we need to just accept that it is what it is and work with it." It was a revolutionary idea! We tried it and in no time at all we found ourselves loving our ward, feeling so close to the sisters in our ward, having fun, remembering names, finding tasks being completed that used to seem impossible. As we discussed this months later I said to my counselors, "I feel like the ward has transformed. I guess it's always been this way, it was just me and my attitude that changed." Thank goodness we can change our outlooks and attitudes! Hopefully I can do that with myself. I hope next year on my birthday to look back over the year and rather than beating myself up for all the mistakes, take what my life was for the year and find the good. Then take that good and build on it for another year. and another and another. I think it's possible, I hope it's possible. It sure would be a nice change!!! Sniff. Thanks for the cry. I feel a lot better.

Happy BIRTH day!!! and Merry Christmas to me!!!

Well folks, I got what I really wanted for Christmas.... a baby!!! Charles almost got what he wanted for Christmas..... he wanted a baby brother, he got a baby boy cousin instead! I think my sister has forgiven me and the children for wishing him here earlier than planned. She went to an appointment the afternoon of December 23rd, and they kept her!!! I was thrilled to pieces. I had hoped that he would come that night, but he took a little bit longer. He was born at 1:15 am on December 24th. He weighed 7 lbs. 1 oz. and was 18 inches long. He is so stinking cute!!! He has some soft, light brown hair. I was terribly impatient waiting for visiting hours. By the time it was "legal" to go, the grandparents and other siblings had arrived from out of town, so I waited a bit longer. He was definately worth the wait! Plus, I got an even better gift than I could have imagined.... they left the hospital yesterday and came here to let my kids hold him (since they aren't allowed in the hospital room) and the storm hit! They were snowed in here!!! Yay for me! I got to have the cutest baby spend the night at my house! I even stayed up late and held him while mom and dad tried hard to catch up on some sleep! Life is great!!! When they came over we had to guess the baby's name. We have been calling him "Squirmy" since we found out about the baby! Charles would always remind us that Squirmy was a pretend name. We are all trying hard to adjust to his "real name." To find out the baby's name, Tressa had us play hangman. Thank goodness we're good guessers! His name is Eric Rawson Mildenhall, and he is so stinking cute!!!! Even his cry is cute, which we seldom get to hear. Indulge now in the cutest pictures ever!!!

Playing "hangman" to figure out his "real" name.

Arrival!!!

The kids saying goodbye to gma and gpa on Christmas Eve. They waited so patiently. Santa Claus even stopped in to see them!

My big, tough brother loving the little baby!!!

Auntie Jen

Aunt Heather

Cutest baby this year!!!! ;)

Charles so excited to hold his new cousin! He's wearing a mask to protect the baby from germs.
He kept trying to move it so he could kiss him!

I got a cute picture tonight of Kaylee holding him.... but I don't have time to put it up now. Maybe tomorrow.

The Higher Plane

Ok, I promised I would rise to higher plane of existence where the booting situation ceased to aggravate me beyond reason. I will share my experience of yesterday and leave it to you to judge. I still am not able to think long on the situation without my blood pressure rising and hateful thoughts coursing through me, but, I no longer scream at unseen booting employees or throw things across the room at the mention of paying money to park. I was even able to remain quite calm today as I balanced my checkbook and included the lovely total of $70 payable to the Cache Auto Booting company. I refrained from replacing the company name with the name I'd like to give them. I think this is all to my credit. But, here is the kicker.....
Yesterday morning as I was preparing to depart in the freezing cold to my post at the crosswalk, I opened the garage to find a HUGE truck and trailer parked directly behind me. To say I was upset is putting it mildly. I sat for a couple minutes debating between three options:
1. Knock on the door and explain that they need to move or I will call the booting company
2. Call the booting company and demand them to boot the vehicle, and the trailer or refund my money
3. Drive my beater into the truck and tell them they shouldn't have parked there.

I decided none of these would work, so I thought hard and came up with number 4... maneuver out of my garage on ice with a one thousand point turnabout and hope they move before I get home. I'll have you know I hit the trailer door lightly with my side mirror, on my NEW car, so that didn't help my mood at all. I returned home after a long hour of positive talk that went like this, "Don't do it. You know you would feel very bad if you called the booters. Keep things nice with your neighbors."
I did it. I made it through the whole day without calling, and they were parked there the ENTIRE DAY!!!!!!! That should count for something for me, don't ya think?

Getting the Boot

For all of you who still think highly of me, skip reading this. For those who know the truth and can handle it, proceed at your own risk.

I am more than upset right now. I live in a very nice townhome. Let me define this. I have a luxury townhome that is roomy and gorgeous on the inside. On the down side..... It has zero yard, and we pay each month to have the lawn and grounds taken care of. I am NOT satisfied with the outcome of the money I pay. Here is what I get for my money each month:

A lawn company who ruins the grass, kills the trees and runs into the houses and fence.
The same lawn company who try to remove snow from the ice skating rink... aka parking lot. bless their little hearts.
A booting company to enforce parking. This may seem like a good thing to some of you, but let me further explain....

The booting started because people who own these townhomes decide to rent to students. Fine. Do it. But FOLLOW THE LAWS!!! There can only be a certain number of non-related people here and they KNOW they are only allowed TWO cars. NOBODY followed this last year and when winter hit, it was impossible to find a parking place. Even more impossible if you were here visiting. And you CAN'T park on the road or you get ticketed. Well, I would take a ticket over a boot. MUCH less expensive, and you can pay it online! There is my advertisement. Ever since this booting began there has been nothing but headache. Sadly, the majority of the headache is for those of us who have followed the rules all along. We have only two cars. We park them in our garages. Even now I see cars that are REGULARLY parked in the parking lot "with permission." Well, folks, it's the same people who've always lived here. Nice problem solving skills. I was always quite put out by this whole ordeal, especially when friends of mine were affected, but now my dislike has risen to an EXTREME level because tonight, my friends, they booted MY car. First let me admit my fault. I was parked behind the townhomes in the way. I knew I was in the way. I had NO intention of being there as long as I was. My friend got to talking, you know how it goes. And let me just add that I was on my way to DO SERVICE, thank you very much. I admit that I should not have parked there. I left my car running, then ran out to move it so another car could get in and decided to turn it off to save gas! The thought entered my mind to just move it home so I didn't have to worry about it, but I didn't want to have to walk across the skating rink in the freezing cold twice. I was stupid. I should've known it would come back and bite me. But for the love, people! I don't pay a large monthly mortgage payment so that people can boot my car for being parked on the very property I pay for. Then to add insult to injury, the boot man parks his car behind mine and he doesn't get booted. I was sure to point this out to him. He didn't find it helpful. Too bad. I would've felt much better about the whole thing. I would have paid my $70 and known he'd have to pay the same for the same offense and all would have been right in my world. I will now go and buy a set of boots for the next time they are illegally parked to enforce illegal parking. I am going to make sweet money for the rest of the time we are doomed to live in this choice community. Don't worry. It's not really as bad as I make it sound. But I think it is. Most of you are probably like my husband who can't understand why I'd be the least bit frustrated at the booting situation. Apparantly I should only be frustrated at myself. Fine, whatever. I'll rise to a higher plane of existense tomorrow. Until then I WILL VENT!!!!!!!!! Does anyone out there understand where I am coming from. Please tell me there is SOMEONE out there who understands what I'm feeling. Anyone? Please? If not, I don't need to hear again that it's my fault. I already know that part. Thanks.